🔥 Don’t be BBQ on two wheels

🚦That one time I baked my ass in the desert...

Pulled off I-40 with the throttle wide open and my brain half-boiled. Thought I was cool with my hydration pack and “mental toughness.” Spoiler alert: I wasn’t. I hallucinated a Dairy Queen. Passed a sign three times. Almost passed out. Ain’t no glory in heatstroke, kids — just ambulance bills and roasted nuts.

So here's the gospel according to Blake: ride smart, or ride sizzlin’.

💧 Hydrate or die fryin’

🧃 Suck water like a busted radiator
💥 Gatorade? Only if it’s got electrolytes.
🚰 Sip every damn chance you get — at gas stops, red lights, and if you gotta, mid-ride like a camel on a caffeine bender.
🥴 If you're not peeing, you're dying.

☠️ Mesh is sexy. Leather is suicide.

😅 All black in the sun? That’s not tough — that’s stupid.
🧥 Mesh jackets = airflow and protection.
🪖 Vented helmet = head that doesn’t cook like a pot roast.
🧤 Light gloves and pants — not jeans, Einstein. Gear up right or melt on impact.
👕 Bonus: Rock a cooling vest if you’re fancy. Or soak your shirt. Or shove ice in your jacket like a damn human cooler.

🌞 Ego check, hotshot

🔥 "I ride no matter what" — yeah, until you’re face down in a ditch, hugging your fried clutch hand.
🕒 Start early. End late. Siesta like a biker lizard from noon to 4.
🧍‍♂️ Stop often. Find shade. Hydrate. Repeat.
🙅‍♂️ Cut the “I don’t need a break” crap. That’s how tombstones get carved.

🛠️ Pro Tip (Desert Ninja Edition)

Soak a neck gaiter in ice water, slap it on your throat like a frosty slap from Mother Nature herself ❄️🥷 You’ll feel like a superhero riding through hell with air conditioning.

🏍️ Ride harder, longer, and don’t die dumb..

Then quit wingin’ it follow the tips above and get out on the road!

Ride Smart, Ride Strong,
Blake "Iron Sage" Rivers

P.S. If you can cook an egg on your tank, it’s too hot to ride without this advice. Unless you are the egg. 🥚🔥