🧽 Clean bikes are cute... but dirty bikes have stories.

You ever see a bike roll up to a gas station, so caked in mud, bugs, and oil it looks like it just clawed its way outta the underworld? 😈

That ain’t neglect. That’s a warrior’s battle scars.

And lemme tell ya—I respect that kind of grime more than any high-gloss showroom finish.

Out on the road, dirt doesn’t lie.
It tells the truth about where you’ve been. 🛣️

🛢️ Dirt vs. Damage: Know What’s Glorious and What’s Gross

Filth can be earned or ignored. Don’t confuse the two, rider.
Here’s how to tell if your bike’s a badge-wearing beast or begging for help:

🟢 GOOD GRIME:

• Dust from a high desert ride 🌵

• Bug splatter from 100 mph highway pulls 🐜💥

• Grease stains from a roadside fix with your own two hands 🛠️

🔴 BAD GRIME:

• Rust where your brakes should be 😬

• Chain gunk so thick it looks like fudge (but smells like regret) 🍫🫠

• Mold. Yes, someone posted a moldy seat once. Still haunts me. 💀

🔥 3 Signs It’s Time to Clean (Before Your Bike Becomes a Biohazard)

1️⃣ Your throttle sticks
That’s not a “vintage feature,” my dude—it’s dirt warfare. Clean it before you end up kissing pavement.

2️⃣ Bugs blockin’ your speedo
If you gotta guess how fast you’re going, and your visor’s clearer than your gauges… time to grab a rag.

3️⃣ The smell hits before your pipes do
If you’re leaving a trail of stank down the road… your bike ain't marking territory, it's cryin' for help.

🧠 PRO TIP

I use what I call the “Selective Scrub Strategy.”
✨ Clean your stoppers (brakes), spinners (chain/wheels), and switchers (controls).
Let the rest get gritty. That’s where the stories live.

I’ve got chain grease older than my last relationship, and I wear it like armor. 💪

🤘 GET LOUD IN THE COMMUNITY

Now here's where the rubber meets the road…

📸 Show me your filth!
Tell me what kind of hell your ride’s been through.

🛠️ Maybe it’s bug guts from 4 states ago.
🌧️ Maybe it’s mud from that monsoon in Missouri.
🔥 Maybe it’s scorched paint from that one time you parked too close to your buddy’s pipe bomb of an exhaust.

Whatever it is—I wanna see it.
Let’s blow up the Chrome and Clutch Community with the dirtiest, crustiest, most road-worn monsters out there.

Drop a pic. Drop the backstory. Drop the damn hose. 🧼💀
» Drop Your Pic Here «
(If you haven’t signed up yet click here)

🧡 FINAL WORDS FROM YOUR FAVORITE FILTHY PHILOSOPHER

A spotless bike is like a clean diary.

Sure, it’s tidy—but where’s the life in it?

Go make some messes. Stack some miles. Get dirty. Then come home, park it, and admire the artwork that is a lived-in machine.

Your bike ain’t meant to be a statue—it’s meant to be a legend. 🤘

Ride smart, ride strong,
Blake "Iron Sage" Rivers

P.S. Got a dirty bike photo? Good.
Now go drop it in the community with the story behind the mess.

I’ll be lurking in the thread, pickin’ my favorite wrecked wonders. Let’s get weird, y’all. 🤠